Chris Stuckmann: Jaws: The Revenge – Hilariocity Review

Chris Stuckmann reviews the cinematic atrocity, Jaws: The Revenge.

About ChrisStuckmann

Quick, funny reviews of movies and games, new and old.


  1. Michael Caine had this to say about this Film: I have never seen it, but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.

  2. The shark is pretty much Freddy Krueger at this point given that it stalks people in their dreams and explodes when it dies.

    That’s sounds nothing like a lion roar. Though it does sound like the T-Rex from Jurassic Park.

    How did they get back to the island? Well, you see, the boat sank and they drowned. Meaning that they all met up in the afterlife. The kids died off screen in a plane crash.

  3. DougWalkersGoatee

    This guy is pointless. Don’t care for his reviews.

    • Then why click and watch them?

    • I’d agree about his standard movie reviews but Hilariocity is working well and his “Problem with” vids are really good!

    • You don’t care for it. So what? He’s pointless? Nope. He’s a straight and forward kinda guy; no gimmick, no spastic drama necessary. He likes movies, he talks about them without trying to go for the quip or unnecessary put-down, and he avoids puns. I like something about all types of reviews, and I appreciate his calm and candor.

      Plus…he’s got some of the greatest expressions on his title cards–it gives you an idea what he thought before you even click on it (which, of course, you don’t have to). And his “Get Stuckmannized” catch-phrase (okay, he’s got one gimmick) is a REALLY good voice! 😀 I look forward to the end of his reviews just for that!

  4. The real mystery is how this script got approved.

  5. Moviemantweeter1999

    Should have watched these awhile ago. Good one. I love to see you pause and I love seeing you react to the funny and dumb stuff in this movie. But the movie is terrible from what you showed so thank god Im probably gonna skip it. You should totally so more of these I will totally watch. Keep up the good work.

  6. Alternate theory: This is really a nightmare one of the characters is having while in a coma. Maybe it’s Ellen Brody’s nightmare. She’s dying and dreaming about this friggin’ shark, which she blames for ruining her marriage and her life, because it threatened her children like a billion times and she wanted to leave the island, but cannot convince her husband.

  7. Jaws: The Revenge is honestly the joint worst movie I’ve ever watched all the way through {I can’t get past the first scene of Godfather or more than 10 minutes into Goodfellas}.
    I’d love for you to review the other worst movie I’ve ever watched all the way through – The PoS that is Star Trek V: The Final Frontier!

    As for Jaws 1,2 and 3 – Yes Jaws is a Great Movie…A Classic! BUT I’ve always found 2 and 3 to be more enjoyable as the first was a bit slow in places.
    I still feel that Jaws 3 is rather unfairly treated {mainly because of the awful 3D}.

  8. TragicGuineaPig

    The shark should just knock on their door and say, “CANDYGRAM!”

    9:30 – This would have been a good point for that “BooBooBooBooBooBoo!” Aquaman fish-talk sound effect.

  9. While I get that it’s more about the Shark taking things personally, the fact that it travelled from New York to the Bahamas actually isn’t that far fetched. In 200-5 a shark nicknamed Nicole swam from South Africa all the way to Australia in 99 days. 6 months later it was spotted back in South Africa.

    So yeah, if a shark really hates you that much, it WILL fucking find you, no matter where you run to.

  10. Dramatic camera view changes for comedic effect….I approve.

  11. As with what Jonathan101 said, Great Whites are known to migrate, so a shark moving between New York and the Bahamas wouldn’t be unheard of (though I very much doubt one held a grudge enough to “follow” a family…)
    Another example is that back in 2002, a Great White was tagged on the Californian coast, then migrated to the warmer waters of Hawaii, staying there for four months before returning.

  12. Seriously, Jaws 4 reviews are not even funny anymore. Its like beating up a dead horse. Every jokes reviewers make about it have been made a thousand times. They’re not even actual jokes, you’re just retelling what’s happenning in the movie and then, you have a dramatic silence like “how stupid is this movie”.

    I saw this movie as a child so yeah, all the stupid things did’nt occured to me first. By the time, having the shark growl made sense to me, as well as the revenge plot…i know.. kids right ^^

    But still now, the opening sequence with Sean is scary. They’re not showing the shark but, you still have this horrific shot of a range of teeth coming at you. You see blood, you hear Sean screaming… They family and dialogue stuff is actually good. I remember the little Théa, Jack and Michael’s wife.

    Micheal himself, i think, has more of a character than he had in Jaws 3 when he was just “random hero N°145”. The all “martin brody died of fear” is a matter of perspective. Old people can be crazy so, maybe Martin died of a simple heart attack and the wife, who almost lost her husband and sons several times, just snaps when she sees her ravaged son’s body.

    Its still a bad movie, but, maybe a review could now focus on elements where the writers actually tried to do something, in order to understand what went wrong with the movie, instead of just repeating “look ! we can see the shark’s zipper ! and it growls !! LoL”.

  13. Haha, this is the first time that I have seen one of your hilariocity reviews.

  14. The first time I watched this attrocity, I actually saw the alternate ending of the shark being impaled and I always thought it looked awesome, but then again, I was like 6 years old when I saw it.

  15. Yeah the Nostalgia Critic already reviewed this fishy super stinker this four years ago dude.

  16. By the way if you go to any beach and swim in any ocean in the middle Atlantic seaboard Chris a certain great white shark will find and swim up to you personally and tell you this “Hello Chris Stuckmann, guess who’s coming to dinner.” She or he might like a taste of Kosher meat no offense, anyway great review not as funny as NC’s but still good.

  17. Even at a very young age (maybe 6 or 7) I knew this was a piece of crap, after loving and being terrified of the first one. Not sure I had seen the 2nd or 3rd, but skipping to the 4th was not a good idea. I think I even thought the shark was Roy Scheider which is why she had a telepathic link to it. I guess that’s the only thing that made sense to me back then…

  18. The shark in the original Jaws also roared.

  19. Yes, I saw the Siskel and Ebert review. It’s notable in being the lowest rated film Ebert ever gave zero stars to. Think about THAT for a minute. I just saw the whole thing and am amazed at how awful it was. It’s the worst sequel I have seen in my entire life.

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