Constantine – Nostalgia Critic

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Keanu Reeves maybe a huge hit again, but there was a time when his career was less than heavenly. Constantine is one of those devilish low points.

About Doug Walker

Creator of 5 Second Movies, Nostalgia Critic, Bum Reviews and more.

4 comments

  1. FIRST! BUS! FIRST! BUS! FIRST!…BUUUUUUUUSSSSSS!

  2. I hate John Constantine (his stuff is just disturbing) but I will say this movie does have style from what I could tell. No Kramer from Seinfeld joke though? Wow, I didnโ€™t know that NC disliked Shia so much.

  3. I was hoping there would be some analysis of why the movie didn’t at least appeal to fans of the comic.

    the comics a bit of a mess too, despite it’s big following (which includes myself.) It’s the DC/Vertigo unicverse, so all religions and mythologies are real, and things aren’t so rooted in catholic mythology specifically. Constantine is written as a guy whose knowledgeable about all things supernatural, but also a bit of a con artist. They try to keep the readers guessing if he’s in control or bluffing his way through situations, but if you add up the things he’s done throughout the comics run, and assume his abilities stay consistent, then he ought to be a match for the entire Justice League. He’s also really British, but a different kind of brit then the more foppish stereotypes you’re used to.

  4. There’s a lot to criticise in this film, but man you did a really bad job on this. So many genuine, basic mistakes and flaws of filmmaking are present, and almost all go ignored in this review. I’ve seen you do legit criticism before, heck you did it recently rather well, but I can’t help but feel you massively dropped the ball in this, way too focused on making fun of the movie and Keanu Reeves especially and not enough on what’s actually wrong with this god-awful movie.

    That’s not even getting into the fact this is a horrible representation of one of the most intriguing mystic characters in comic history. John Constantine is a selfish, manipulative, boarder-line evil prick in the source material who consistently gets everyone around him killed, often because he’s too busy saving his own skin. Plus, he’s supposed to be British, making him american is a fucking middle finger to anyone who already gave a crap about the character.

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