MikeJ: Week on Ration Packs Day 2

Day 2 of an entire week eating nothing but ration packs!

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About mikej

Movie review shows from Mike Jeavons, a British Person, including "Shameful Sequels" & "Hang on a Second", along with music videos and sketches.


  1. TerminalSanity

    The it figures the German’s would have one of the more austere no frills rations wouldn’t it?

    • The German military has 4 types of rations – this, an upgraded version of it, the EPA (comparable to a British ORP or a US MRE), and the EPA “light” (sort of like the US first strike rations)

      This is a German *emergency* ration. Designed to keep you alive as long as possible while using as little weight as possible – 100g per day – and when you’re even cut off from a water supply. Another emergency ration exists that has a little more content, among them tea bags.

      A German standard ration (EPA) is, apart from some cultural differences, pretty much like any other in the western world – two hot meals, bread, butter, selection of jams and meat spreads, drink mix, chocolate. etc.: http://www.mreinfo.com/images/de/einmannpackung-type-3.jpg

      So, yes, it’s quite silly to compare this bare-minimum-survival brick to the british ration of day one.

  2. radioactivewombat

    Looks like a lump of chalk… Maybe it’s meant to let you write “HELP SEND FOOD” on a wall and then eat it long enough for help to arrive…

    • Professor von SCIENCE!!!

      I think you’re half right. You have to carve help into the bar of soap- I mean ration- and then throw it as hard as you can and hope it kills something edible.

  3. High Energy Saltlick would be a good band name.

  4. So, who else here wants Mike to do “a week on Die Deutsche Überlebenration diet” now?

  5. I think you’re supposed to dissolve the brick in hot water and eat it like soup, not just eat it straight. Looks pretty unappetizing either way of course, but might be somewhat easier to consume that way. (Remind me never to join the German military…)

  6. The german “überlebensration” is made so that the stomach can absorb it extremely quickly. So even if you stuff all at once into you, it dissolves like a little piece Dextro Energy on the tongue. Made so that you life for one more day, not to be well-fed.

  7. Mama Uschi’s Gourmet Menu

  8. Where do you find all these ration packs?

  9. Based on what I’ve culled on Google, they’re designed *not* to be eaten quickly. If you were literally starving, and shoved it all in your mouth at once, it would clump into a jawbreaker-like lump you would have to suck on like a Gobstopper. Apparently, if you boil it in milk it makes a sugary-tasting pudding. They’re designed to have a 40-year shelf life!

    • They’re also last-ditch emergency survival rations. Basically just enough nutrients to keep someone alive for a day crammed into a 100 gram bar.

  10. MidnightScreeningsman2014

    Oh god mike you poor thing i just think that your patreons want to watch you suffer for a week on something but i just think that the youtubers are supporting and chances are the patreons are youtube commenters who hate you or it could be the other way around. But I have no idea what ration packs are but i can’t wait to find out what they are thourgh the next 4 days you you eat them.

  11. caffeinatedkate

    This is the closest I’ve seen yet to sci-fi food, shame it doesn’t seem to be much good. Still, none of the others can be this bad. It’s got to be uphill from here, right?
    I would guess you have an American one. Not wishing to be racist, but I can’t help thinking an American one would contain doughnuts.

    • No, but until very recently, it did contain cigarettes.

    • TerminalSanity

      No doughnuts apart from the packaging the American rations are pretty much identical to the British ones right down the cheap peanut butter so much so I’m willing to bet the same multinational corporation makes them both. About only difference I suspect will be instead of a tube of polos there will be a bag of skittles/M&Ms or a Snickers bar, that and the bisckets will be labelled crackers.

      On a side note they sometimes with a little bottle of Tabasco too which is great if you like hot spicy pepper flavors and great for pulling pranks on people who don’t.

      • The one time I saw the insides of a ration pack (American), it was indeed M&Ms. Peanut butter M&Ms to be exact. The rest was very much similar to the British one from day 1. Instant oatmeal, some kind of meaty rice dish, etc.

  12. You mean that this tablet of bland and nutritious white stuff is German’s idea of the ideal rations?


    Leave it to the Germans to make rations that is absolutely everything it should be (nutritious and portable), while ignoring completely the human factor (impact on morale). It’ll keep you alive, but make you wish you weren’t.

    • Well, we have Angela Merkel. Even this lump of chalk boosts morale if you can die and therefore don’t have to endure the mother of the führer.

    • If conditions are so desperate that they’re dipping into the emergency rations instead of the usual EPA rations, odds are morale’s gone down the shitter already.

  13. On the bright side tomorrow’s rations will taste extra delicious.

  14. Now THIS was more what I was expecting out of military rations, something small enough to ship in large quantities, not take up a lot of space in a soldier’s pack, allegedly will keep you alive for a day and will make you utterly miserable.

  15. AloneAmongstGods

    Don’t know if anyones answered this yet, but the box said that the bar is basically made out of carbohydrates. It said it right on the front, but only in german. Just in case anyone was wondering.

  16. sorry but I have never been in the armed forces so maybe I am missing something but would solders not normally supplement the ration packs with things they find in the field IE fruits, veg, nuts, berries maybe the odd rabbit?

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