Demolition Man – Nostalgia Critic

Brilliant commentary or dumb D*ck Flick? Check out the Nostalgia Critic’s movie review of 1993’s Demolition Man to find out!

About Doug Walker

Creator of 5 Second Movies, Nostalgia Critic, Bum Reviews and more.

304 comments

  1. The Mysterious M

    My thought is Demonlition Man is just a mindless action movie. But it’s kind of mindless action movie that’s enjoyable. Sort of like (and I can’t believe I’m actually saying I like a movie done by Michael Bay AND Nicholas Cage) The Rock.

    Speaking of which, please in the future do an NC on The Rock

    • The Rock was enjoyable since it was Pre-Armageddon Bay.

      Armageddon – Pearl Harbor – The Island – Transformers = Rise of the Bay we know today..

      • Professor von SCIENCE!!!

        Yeah, he’s kinda like M. Knight Shamalamasama but with fart jokes and explosions instead of stupid twists.

      • You just have to look at the tone and difference between bad boys 1 and 2 for proof of that.

        • If you look at Bay’s filmography there is one factor that connects all his good movies and is missing from his bad ones.
          Jerry Bruckheimer.
          Jerry Bruckheimer was executive producer on all Bay’s good movies. I suppose some creators work best with someone else to filter them a bit. Case in point Travis Beacham is a Hollywood writer, by himself what does he create? Clash of the Titans (ugh!) but team him with Guillermo Del Toro and what do you get? Pacific Rim!
          Speaking of Bay is the NC going to review Pain & Gain or Armageddon at some point? They’re the only michael Bay films (aside from the Bad Boys films and The Rock) that he hasn’t talked about yet.

          • The Mysterious M

            You know it’s funny… watching the stuff he did for Disney, I always considered Jerry Bruckheimer like diet Michael Bay.

      • Of course, the real problem with the Transformers movies is Ehren Kruger. The first Transformers movie was by no means a masterpiece, but it was at least somewhat respectable. The writers of that film went on to be the primary creative force on arguably the greatest Transformers series ever made, Transformers Prime. So what when wrong?

        Ehren Kruger was added on as a writer for Revenge of the Fallen, and he was the sole writer on Dark of the Moon and Age of Extinction. I think it’s pretty clear who’s fault the writing, and therefore most of the issues, is: the writer of the films. And unfortunately, while Bay is rumored to not be directing the next film, Ehren Kruger, as of now, is still likely to be writing it.

    • He’s probably sitting on that for another Cage month *insert bear punch*

  2. What you said about this Demolition does remind me about original Robocop and how more fitting it’s today than back then.

  3. I loved this movie in 1993 and still love it today. Back in 1993, my family didn’t even have the internet back then and it’s hilarious how times have changed according to this movie.

    And yes, 1996 in LA was portrayed accurately in this movie. I should know since I lived nearby. XD

  4. ThatManWithTheHeadband12

    A “MAN!” Movie you say? Well then no wonder Lewis starts filming the Atop the Fourth Wall Movie. HE IS A MAN! *punch*

  5. DEVIL BONER!!!!

  6. Who else hates that the State Farm ads always take forever to play?

  7. This movies was brilliant and prophetic in predicting the terrible PC era america is trapped in today

    by the way, if you want the real dead, go 8-chan

    • Yeah, because being mindful of other people is so bad. Why don’t you move to Somalia if you detest “PC” so much?

      • I going to tell you what your going to do. Why don’t you get a little dirty. Hansk alot clean. and somewhere in the middle… I don’t know you’ll figure it out.

      • Why don’t you move to Somalia?
        What are you Fox News?
        Mindlessly agree with me or piss off mentality? What the hell is wrong with you?

        He is correct the PC movement can get out of control.

        • If you don’t want the safety of civilisation because you think “PC” is a legitimate thing and not a buzzword, by all means move to where your ideals flourish.

          • “Those who would give up freedom for security deserve neither.” As true today as it ever was. And you’re proving both commenters right with your appeals to emotion.

          • PC also become a crutch by which you can justify stifling free speech. If what you say offends me, then I can oppress you. Yeah PC can allow for tyranny of the minority. Where societies ills such as poverty, murder, homelessness, starvation, political suppression, and lack of work is secondary to words. Because ooh I am offended, and other things are too hard to rectify.

          • >whines about appeal to emotion
            >uses a phrase appealing to outrage as its sole argument.

            My, you people sure do love being hypocrites.

        • So can the movement of people who think that deliberately being assholes makes them great crusaders for free speech. It winds up eating it’s own tail. They go around deliberately trying to piss people off and then when people do get pissed off, they screech about “persecution” and “censorship” because they’re morons who think that “freedom of speech” means they can say whatever they want but then no one else is allowed to say anything against it. I’ve seen them compare the down voting of an imgur post to genocide and then turn around and pretend that they’re the rational ones. Then there’s the ones who use “fighting back against the SJWs!” as a cover for their racism and sexism and an excuse to attack anyone who acknowledges that those things still exist.

        • The irony of you comparing him to Fox News is so big that “Ironic” has become actually about irony.

      • PC isn’t that. When people say PC, they usually intend ‘everything offends me’ people.

    • When you put “PC” I thought you meant “Personal Computer” which kind of made sense and was accurate but “Politically Correct” makes much more sense and is much more of a nuisance to society.

  8. I'mVeryAngryIt'sNotButter

    20:48

    “Could’ve catched him.”

    “catched”

    I think I’m on the verge of an aneurysm here.

    • I'mVeryAngryIt'sNotButter

      Well. Follow-up research indicates that “catched” is actually a word.

      Still doesn’t sound right, though.

      • I think the word you are searching for in this situation is “caught”. “Could’ve caught him.”

        Mind you whereas “caught” is grammatically correct, “catched” has appeared in popular text and written works from way back when (I believe Mark Twain used it often).

    • I'mVeryAngryIt'sNotButter

      But I’m giving the wrong impression. Apart from this little nitpick, I think this is one of my favorite reviews from you in a long time.

  9. Hi Loved the review, but I still think this movie sucks.

  10. Malcolm was actually lighter than he looked
    *cough*

  11. I still wonder about the three seashells to this day. LOL!!!

    • I guess those are simply buttons to control automatic toilet. Those are strange even nowadays (outside Japan), so how strange this idea would be then? Even if this is manual “automatic” toilet.

      But seriously, this film is mix of action-flick and parody. This idea probably shouldn’t have sense on the first place.

      • Mm, I was thinking “bidet” back in the day….the seashells were the controllers for sterilizing your hand and water/automatic something wiping your ass for you so you don’t risk the fecal-oral rough of bacterial spread…which is bad for you and hence, it is illegal.

        WASH YOUR HANDSSSS!!

    • She was actually correct. The writers explained that it was a half thought out idea that wasn’t supposed to be explained in the movie.
      http://www.aintitcool.com/node/30865

      It’s interesting how many of the technologies are actually potentially possible in this movie.

    • Tamara’s explanation is actually the official one from the writer.

  12. Malcolm outlawed all crime…but isn’t crime already…nevermind.

  13. Wait, what was the villain’s name again?

  14. His full name is Malcolm Ray? That sounds like a superhero name 😀 Great review, Doug! One of the funniest ones in a while.

  15. You know what this eview needs? More DEVIL BONER!!!

    … and P(h)enis!!!

  16. I’ve seen the seashell explanation before, and still don’t understand why people in the future would need to pull poop out of their butt with clasped shells instead of just, you know, pooping. Must have something to do with all that Taco Bell.

    • That was a joke explanation. The whole seashell thing was a joke and will probably never be answered because the makers never intended on explaining it.

      Sandra Bullock made a joke explanation on how they work, but no one really knows.

    • It is a joke. In the future the toilets are bidets and seashells are just common decoration for restrooms. Schneider says “What you haven’t heard of the three seashell method?” to fuck with Stallone, that’s why everyone laughs so hard at him.

  17. i was looking forward to this review cause i love Demolition Man, but the forced skits really made it difficult to watch…

  18. wait taco bell….? the Demolition Man film i watched over the years has them saying Pizza Hut?

  19. That Tumblr vs 4CHAN comparison was hilarious. I got so many laughs.

  20. God I love the character of the critic…

  21. Have you been eating Private Baldrick’s Fillet Mignon by any chance Critic?

  22. Forget the three seashells – the biggest mystery for me is why we decided in the late 90’s to start freezing all of our criminals – and apparently ONLY the criminals. Because I guess forget about astronauts, war heroes and Olympians, you just never know when you’re going to need a bunch of dangerous psychopaths in the future…

  23. Yup, this clearly looks like an ahead-of-its-time satire disguised as an action film, and this was suggested to me on IMDB.

  24. Good lord the modern world is sooooo much better than the 90s (Didnt experience the 80s :D)). Interesting that the NC looked in the movie so deep

  25. Stallone’s partner in this “Brave New World” happens to be named Huxley.

    • Haha. I remember that I saw this in the theater and didn’t think much of it until a year later when a couple of my friends had to read “A Brave New World” for honors English, and I decided to read the book to help them with their “book reports” (they called them essays in school, but, yeah…) by letting them bounce ideas off me. I was jes that kind a friend. But, then we caught “Demolition Man” on cable after reading the book, and I remember being blown away about how similar the stories were in both.

    • Not just Huxly, but her first name is Lenina. I couldnt belive how mcuh this movie parallels BNW.

  26. I like this movie its great
    The two women that you showed when you were talking about good heroin in the beginning you not only shown terrible movies but also horrible characters
    Segal was cool and has great movies
    How do you use the three seashells
    World with no sex is a world i don’t want to live
    The Rocky speech was so worse then this speech

    • The seashells is a joke according to the director. In the future the toilets are bidets and seashells are just common decoration for restrooms. Schneider says “What you haven’t heard of the three seashell method?” to fuck with Stallone, that’s why everyone laughs so hard at him.

      • I love that explanation, though it’s pretty clear the director made it up afterwards just to have something to tell the fans. The shells wouldn’t be sitting on a special shelf all lined up next to the toilet if they were just for decoration.

      • Well, Stallone himself doesn’t agree. He says something along the same lines as Tamara, that you scoop the turd out of your crack with one then use another to wipe your shitter. Either way though it’s both one of the weaker aspects of the film AND ironically one of the most enduring as people are still theorising over it.

  27. Hold on! Taco Bell out-lived McDonalds, Wendys, Five Guys Burgers, Olive Garden (although I think we can all agree that one will fall first), Pizza Hut, Papa Johns, Little Caesars, Applebee’s, Chucky Cheese, Burger King, and Ray’s Pizza? There has to be a conspiracy behind that!

  28. One thing I remember about this movie is on the standard dvd release (bare in mind….I am Australian….not sure if that is significant) is that the name of Taco Bell was terribly dubbed to “Pizza Hut” Is that just an Australian thing?

    • That seemed odd so I did a quick bit of research. At the time of the movie’s release the chain restaurant from the US was not allowed to operate in Australia under the name “Taco Bell” because the name was found to be too similar to a Sydney based restaurant. At the time both Taco Bell and Pizza Hut were owned by Pepsico (since then the restaurant division was spun off to create a new company called Yum! Brands (yes, the exclamation mark is part of the company name.) So the switch was likely done to make sure the product placement would still work in Australia.

  29. What’s the deal with the three seashells?

    That just work.

    That is all.

    • Er….They just work.

      Stupid fingers.

    • The seashells is a joke according to the director. In the future the toilets are bidets and seashells are just common decoration for restrooms. Schneider says “What you haven’t heard of the three seashell method?” to fuck with Stallone, that’s why everyone laughs so hard at him.

  30. I have thought of Demolition Man the same way you concluded it there. It was very smartly written, acted well and was very forward on the PC world. I will admit, I despise Political Correctness, as its the mentality of thin skinned morons who cant stand up for themselves and need PC policies to protect their feelings.

    Its great how this movie overcomes that while balancing out an overly PC world. Its actually a great take on todays world.

    • “I despise Political Correctness, as its the mentality of thin skinned morons who cant stand up for themselves and need PC policies to protect their feelings.”

      No, it’s acknowledging that the people you’re likely spouting hateful lies and bullshit about are actually in the audience.

      Actually, it’s identifying what is correct by the values and self-identity of the culture in which you’re operating. Which means that decrying “Political Correctness” is, for some parts of American culture, the most cheaply PC thing you can do.

      • No, the most cheaply PC thing you can do is support PC to start with. It is the political speech of cowards who refuse to call things what they really are. Instead of calling what things are, they dance around them and call them vaguely descriptive things for the false name of feelings and desire to control speech.

        In short, just end PC, it only ruins society.

        • You call respecting people’s rights to decide who and what they are, rather than let the bigotry of others do so for them, “the political speech of cowards who refuse to call things what they really are”?

          Of course you do. You probably also say that to people who support you as you go on to say that homosexuality is a choice or the people on welfare are all parasites. And, everybody is so proud of themselves for being a place where somebody can “call it like it really is”. Just a guess.

          • Literally the entire point of human rights activists trying to remove slurs and similar shit from people’s vocabularies IS TO CALL THINGS WHAT THEY ARE; to not perpetuate harm by using words that carry a “hey this person is inherently bad for being [XYZ]” meaning, but to instead call people what they prefer to be called because they’re the authority on their own identities.

            White knighting can be a genuine problem, though. If I had a dollar for every time some non-Autistic loudmouth blathered about how it’s “person with autism” not “Autistic person” or how autism is a tragic disease when I, an actual real live Autistic person, should be the one saying “no you jackass it’s ‘Autistic person’, and it’s a disability, not a disease; stop flapping your lips and listen to the person you’re claiming to advocate for”.

          • …I’d probably have enough to pay off my student loans.

          • White Knighting is… a thing. It’s not as bad a thing as being the asshole in the first place, I’d argue, but it’s still a thing and a temptation that one should resist.

            But, yes, it’s to call people/things what they actually are, not someone’s slur/bigoted assumption about what they are.

          • Nobody has the right to not be offended. I bet you’re the same kind of pandering dipshit who thought the Charlie Hedbo massacre was justified. You need to grow up and learn there’s a difference between criticism, abuse, and attack.

          • Who’s plying a “right to not be offended”?

            You say something offensive, people tell you that’s offensive, most likely ignorant, and why. That’s how PC works.

            Deal with it.

        • “The speech of cowards”? Do you realise how twelve yer old-ish you sound?

          As Linkara often says, kindness is not a weakness.

        • If you believe that saying racist, sexist and homophobic things is “calling things what they really are” then (congrats!) you’re racist, sexist and homophobic.

        • Really? Supporting anything PC gets you hated. Hating PC gets you in the world’s largest circle jerk. Being anti-PC is PC.

    • I love how sociopaths think being a decent human being and not offend others is bad. It’s almost hilarious how your ilk whines about “sjws” “not living in the real world”, when you bubble yourself in libertarian fantasies that ignore the proven necessity for protections and rights.

      • SimmonsTwoPointOh

        fuck peoples feelings. the world is built on being a bitter bastard.
        and it makes me happy.

        and SJWs are a different animal meant o undermine peoples rights.

        • My, how edgy. Ignoring the fact that your logic is pretty much denying reality – literally, just grab any psychology textbook: emotions enhance thought -, if anything you pretty much admit you don’t care about society at large.

          A parasite, ironically enough.

          • Ah, first-year psych students… never lose that drive you have.

          • You don’t have any logic in your argument to begin with. You’re just posting a bunch of non-sequitor appeals to emotion. And in doing so, you’re proving yourself to be just the kind of sycophantic, ethically delusional pretentious bore that Walker was rightly criticising in his review, along with the other extreme which is those who deliberately provoke.

            You are not a bastian of goodness, you’re the exact opposite. You keep people separate and distrusting with your nihilistic arrogance.

          • You tell him, creepy hypocrite who misquotes Benjamin Franklin into an extremist out of context and BRINGS UP A RECENT TRAGIC MASS MURDER just to make a strained accusation that the opposing side must support such acts. It’s everybody else who’s pandering, illogical, and appealing to emotion. Thank god you can calmly explain your side instead of lining up a bunch of insults and living up to every last one of them without any sense of irony.

        • OMG, UR SO KEWL U CANT EVN SPEL!!! TAK THAT SOSIETY!!!!

      • PC does absolutely noting to protect rights. Its pure cowardliness, as it refuses to call things what they really are. For example, instead of calling some black, you call them African American, even though they are only American and have no duel citizenship to any African nation. What is the point of PC other than to control speech by telling people what and what not to call things.

        I have nothing against being polite to anyone, and actually I am to everyone, since I work with the public, but I never use PC speech since its a waste of time and is largely stupid and inaccurate.

        The actual psychopaths actually support PC, since they are so concerned about feelings the people they claim really care about. In all honesty, PC is only for those self conscious liberals/progressive who cant see beyond skin color or religion and only use that as the base argument for PC. As an other example of PC gone stupid, try the Red Skins. PC people claim its insults the native Indians, yet find no tribes insulted by them and in fact, the name Red Skins in its origins was actually a respectable name the Indians had no issue with for the sports team. Heck, PC is only supported by angry white liberals who falsely think someone else feelings are hurt by what they think if offensive.

        • SailorRustyBacon

          Dude! Did you know that some people get offended by simply even being called “Dude” just as an expression?

          Even the word “fat” has been getting labeled as “offensive” lately. Well, I hope companies take a note of that and relabel their “fat-free” foods as something like “health conscious-appropriate” if they want to be progressively forward, like their consumers. Of course, I say that with tongue in cheek now, but I think I’d be shocked when the day comes and I actually see that on store shelves.

        • It looks like someone missed the part where thousands of Native Americans protested the use of a racist slur that was literally once used used as proof by white hunters trying to clear Native lands that they had killed Natives (they collected Native scalps and other body parts to claim a bounty) as a team name. http : // www . washingtonpost . com/local/in-minnesota-native-americans-march-rally-to-protest-redskins-name/2014/11/02/fc38b8d0-6299-11e4-836c-83bc4f26eb67_story.html

        • Here is video footage of actual Natives explaining why that word is a slur. http : // thedailyshow . cc . com/videos/189afv/the-redskins–name—catching-racism

          Do your fucking research.

        • So what you’re saying is we’d be evil not to call you “horsefuckers.”

          • It is just stupid, and it have nothing to do with “sensitivity” because it is straight offensive be any mean. If you would say that calling someone “YouTuber” is offensive (because not everyone use YouTube or something) that is the exaple of PS BS invention here.

            Simply some common descriptions are offensive and incorrect like saying that hackers are cyber criminals for example (they aren’t), but in many cases people overreact (PC) and simply invent some BS what no one outside them consider offensive to someone, or even in some cases “offended” people use those on they own to describe themselves.

            For example reason why calling someone “black” is considered offensive is because it was used pejoratively in time of segregation. But that not mean that it is this same in every case.

            One of such examples of PC idiocy is claim that people from United States shouldn’t be called Americans, because on American continent are more nation then that one. Of course no one from those nations care, only PC people do.

          • Your caveman English and lack of comprehension are straight offensive be any mean. I don’t see the word “horsefucker” as offensive and don’t use it to be. I call my friends who watch that shitty cartoon horsefuckers all the time and they understand and laugh because they’re smart enough to comprehend that instead of getting offended. Besides, the way they look at those horses, I’m just calling it as it is.

            You’re part of the stupid PC police trying to block my shine just because you don’t get it. How quaint and beneath me. This is why I only talk to people smart enough to already agree with me and share my opinions.

        • I say this as a man who is into other men, and is also part of the furry community at large–if you can’t take a joke, and you get offended very easily, the internet is not a good place for people to be. Don’t get me wrong–MANY take it too far, but something that many also forget, is that so many comedians did the exact same thing.

          No, really, I want you to think about it: George Carlin, one of my personal favorites, pushed the boundaries on what many thought socially-acceptable comedy was. (Though, many do argue that the comedy took a downward turn since then, with only a handful of good ones coming about now.)

          Either way though, I’m not offended easily–racial slurs do not bother me as I’ve heard them my whole life. If we don’t take ownership of these words, of our fears, of the pain that can be caused, then we have no future. Censoring speech is the worst thing that can happen to people. Don’t get me wrong, you act like a dick, you deserve to be called a dick.

          Anyway, that’s all I have to say on this debate. No hard feelings for anyone, and if we cannot come to an agreement, then that’s alright; I probably disagree with many things you agree with, and that’s just fine. If nothing else, take away this from my long, drawn-out comment: I respect you and your beliefs, even if I disagree with them. If I say something you dislike, I apologize, and if it offends you, I apologize again, but I will not retract my statement. If it is false, then I will still not remove it, as people should be allowed to see my idiocy full-force.

          So, to any who have read this whole thing, have a pleasant evening, and a good rest of the week and weekend, if you will. G’day. 🙂

          • @Ludditz
            “if you can’t take a joke, and you get offended very easily, the internet is not a good place for people to be.”

            So people are allowed to be offended by what you ARE and to call you “faggot” or “creep” without any irony. But if you are offended by what they SAY, you’re just a SJW who deserves to be kicked out of the internet?

            “Either way though, I’m not offended easily–racial slurs do not bother me as I’ve heard them my whole life. If we don’t take ownership of these words, of our fears, of the pain that can be caused, then we have no future.”

            You’re mixing two totally different subjects here:
            1°the right to laugh at people for their “alledged” stupidity (quote:”you act like a dick, you deserve to be called a dick” like you said).
            2° the right to hate people for what they are (to be xenophobic/homophobic/sexist…etc.). Which is actually “being a dick”.

            1° Is what George Carlin was doing. I never heard him sincerely doing 2° His “edgiest” sketches were about politic and religion, where he was attacking opinions and what people DO, not what they WERE.

            I don’t like the fact that Political Correctness is only aimed against those who are afraid to harm people’s feelings (though those who actually go too far deserve mockery and criticism) and not at those who hate different human beings for their appearance or try to silence the thoughts they judge dangerous for society (feminism, anti-racism…). Indeed, not so long ago, promoting racism, sexism and hating equal rights WAS “politically correct”. And there are plenty of places where this is still the norm.

          • We are not mixing 2 different things. Making a joke does not mean you are a bigot.

            I make fried chicken and watermelon jokes all the time. And I am black.

            So am I uncle fucking ruckus now?

        • ”Political correctness” is basically just another word for politeness. Everybody railing against is basically acting like a teenager, saying: ”Fuck you, you can’t tell me what to do! You’re not my real dad! If i so desire, i can take a dump right in the middle of the street and you can’t do anything about it. All you cultural marxist PC beta manginas should just leave me alone!”

          • You only need to read any article on Cracked posted over the last six or seven years to know that ‘political correctness’ and ‘politeness’ are not the same thing. This is a fallacy, plain and simple. Political correctness is a term that exists to justify ignoring factual correctness. The ONLY type of correctness that matters is that which is true, not that which is ideologically approved by some guy somewhere.

          • That is one retarded example when Cracked.com was never about being polite or politically correct. Did you think the word “asshole” showing up in literally thousands of their articles was part of polite conversation or politically correct ones?

            As for factual correctness, here’s the Mirriam-Webster definition of being politically correct:
            “agreeing with the idea that people should be careful to not use language or behave in a way that could offend a particular group of people.”

            If you think that has more to do with ignoring facts than being polite, your straw boogeyman definition of political correctness is factually incorrect.

      • High five. I wish I was rich. I’d find poor libertarians and have them made into boots to wear for fun.

    • Okay, regardless of your stance on the matter, people who constantly whine about political correctness are far more of a nuisance than it can ever hope to be. Much like Justin Bieber and Call of Duty.

    • Also, I think there’s a perfect quote for this.

      “Freedom of speech doesn’t come with a dental plan.” – Marilyn Manson

      You see, you certainly could go up to an MMA fighter and mock him for painting his toenails blue. However, when your head is ripped off your body and shoved inside your anus, you’ll realize… well, nothing, because you’ll be dead. However, in those few seconds before you die, you’ll likely realize you shouldn’t have done that. Remember this quote from Jurassic Park: “Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should”? Well, in this case, it’s not scientists, but you’re still making the same mistake. Yes, you can do it. However, you might lose your head.

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