Nostalgia Critic: Signs

Back when people still liked M. Night Shyamalan, but God knows why.

About Doug-Walker

Creator of 5 Second Movies, Nostalgia Critic, Bum Reviews and more.

6 comments

  1. Just watched this again and remembered another thing that pisses me off about M. Douche Shyamalan: He has no understanding of what science is and how it works. How are aliens showing up in flying saucers going to change “everything they wrote in science books”? Advanced technology works under the same laws of physics as outdated machines and tools. It doesn’t matter if a caveman throws a stone or you fire a gun, the trajectories are calculated exactly the same way (velocity, angle, gravity). The ancient Greeks didn’t know there would be a building that’s 2,722 ft high one day, but they already had all the math that’s needed to build it.

  2. One thing that really bugs me is: if these aliens have trouble with wood, how did their ancestors even develop the primitive technology necessary to do anything. It’s not like metal grows and can be harvested in the same manner.

  3. WOOD! That gets me every time!

  4. ok, so if the aliens can’t get through pantry doors, then how did the one alien get in their living room? He obviously got out somehow. We know it was him cause he was missing the two fingers. It seems like the aliens very easily smashed through their boarded up windows, too, so its pretty clear wood is not some impossible obstacle for them. Then people always complain about the water. It seems pretty easy to figure out that the aliens had never encountered water before. The army guy explains the they would send in scout teams to assess the level of danger. Of course why would Doug pick up on this when he is too busy whining about the guy not closing his mouth. This explains why the aliens left so quickly and left behind their wounded like the alien in the pantry. trying too hard.

    • You can see the water from space.
      In fact you could tell the chemical composition of our planet from another solar system.
      P.S. Water is one of the most common molecules in the universe.
      The aliens should have been able to tell that without needing go come anywhere near Earth.

  5. TheCynicalChef

    Interstellar travel in spacecrafts capable of entering the atmosphere… but no armor or environment suits. Radar invisibility, but no guns. They made it to the solar system from a world so alien normal aspects of the planet are toxic to them, but were coordinated so primitively they needed crop circles to designate targets. Their ships apparently were impossible to be targeted by normal missiles, but the only weapon we see is a poison gas spray.

    And here’s another thing. Why’d they invade AT ALL? What was the motivation? This is seriously as flimsy as L. Ron Hubbard’s sci-fi, the aliens in Signs are as stupid as the ones in Battlefield Earth. They have technology capable of chemical scans in orbit, interstellar travel complete with teleportation, WHY INVADE EARTH?! Surely if they had advanced enough technology to find an incredibly rare habitable world they would have had technology to scout THE ASTEROID BELT AND KNOW EARTH COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED ENTIRELY IF ALL THEY WANTED WAS GOLD! The planet wasn’t habitable to THEM, they apparently lacked the means of terraforming the world, and any rain or someone sneaking a banana into the Psychlo atmosphere could kill countless members of their species.

    Sc-fi really is best left to the nerds, not failed directors and failed therapists.

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