Shameful Sequels: Dungeons & Dragons 2

OH GOD! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOOOOP!

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Movie review shows from Mike Jeavons, a British Person, including "Shameful Sequels" & "Hang on a Second", along with music videos and sketches.

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66 Comments on "Shameful Sequels: Dungeons & Dragons 2"

JahLis
Guest

wait, what? WHAT? they made a second one? that’s just… wrong.

Rocketboy1313
Guest

They made a 3rd one too.

“The Book of Vile Darkness”

No joke, kind of fun.

Arwijn
Guest
No no no… The first Dungeons & Dragons movie was just aweful and too stupid to even be funny longer than maybe a few giggles. The second one is something else. It’s far more like the real dungeons and dragons world with many references to deities character classes and powers. I loved many of the characters in this movie. They where colorful and serious. I like that. The third movie i have mixed feelings about. It is an “Evil setting” apparently, and it looks and plays out pretty decent, and creepy at times. But the story behind the evil is… Read more »
Arwijn
Guest
StealthMarmot
Guest
This was a bad idea from the start, but surprisingly this movie didn’t insult D&D players as much, but instead showed why a D&D movie isn’t a generally good idea. The complex rule systems and worlds are too intricate to help people understand the hows and whys in a short movie. I could actually see what was going on since I was familiar with the rules, but a non-D&D player would be all “Whaaaa?” On the other hand, this movie is also just a great big pile of shit by just about every measure imaginable. Seriously name some aspect of… Read more »
KiraNis
Guest

Exactly what I was gonna say but Marmot rolled a 20 and got to go first.

Yeah you have no idea what’s going on because these movies are for D&D fans I forgot how much they actually were now I feel bad suggesting them to the critic.

Drahauk
Guest

You pipped me to the post here. The second they mentioned Jubilex I thought “The Hell are you doing bringing up him? No one who isn’t a player is gonna know his shtick”.

And that’s just a microcosm of the problems with the film.

RJ Dalton
Guest

Besides that, they got it wrong. They said, if I overheard him correctly, that goblins worship Jubilex, but goblins worship Maglubiyet. Unless I completely misheard the line or that was two different scenes spliced together. I kinda can’t tell with the way that bit was edited.

KiraNis
Guest

Eh it’s not a strict think they mention these particular goblins do not all of them so i guess that’s a point in the movies favor I guess but they really could of mentioned it’s the god of slimes oozes and jellies just so mike could make a jam sammich joke.

Chieftac
Guest

There aren’t even blue lips in this movie!! 😀

cniu
Guest

all the “plotholes” mentioned in the movie are actualy explained,you just skipped or don’t pay attention,the dragon is called a god mulple times,so sword are not option,the book contein the location of oracle,all this is mentioned on the scene of the party(team) assemble,the mage assistent explod leaveng he alone ,annd some time later on scene they find the orbhe basic have bad gay write is his head,the a creature who CHANGE form and is helping the villan kill everyone offscreen ,do the math.the a lot of problems on the movie are not mentioned,but i personally like

Just1
Guest
I absolutely believe that you personally like the movie… Just wondering did you write part of the script or just learn to type in the “je ne sais quoi” style as D&D 2? P.S If the dragon was a god, how were they able to find it?, how were they able to get so close to it without it knowing? how were they able to open its eyelid? How were they able to open its eyelid and it not know it?… So as much as you say “…called a god mulple times, so sword are not option,…” If they were… Read more »
cniu
Guest
i mot mmade ilogical points to defend this movie,i know there are plothole but the real one,like people doing stup things when they are experinced adventurers like notice the lich posing as the cleric or the cleric no seek cover against a dragon exploding,none of this are adrees,inted go for the ones aren’t true,they are the part when he ask “what hell these people are talking about”,they are in a heavy lore fashion explain the plot,somepeople maybe dislike the exposion(i understand that is a reason for not like0 About the dragon-god the captain was investigate a report of poison gas… Read more »
cniu
Guest
sorry abou the cutshot post THE CAVE INSIDE A MOUTAIN, and remenber a old story about a dragon worshipped as god who was KILLED in the kingdom,so ans’t sleeping,was regenerating, and yes ,ststab the eye,it’s not like it’s gonna gas the cave as did just before you got here Yes the plot is not oscar material,the pacing could be improvedand the writers throw game specific term like candy ,but i really see a straightforward fun movie I just see one of my favorite reviwers made some comments what i see as not true, Mikej say say it’s boring i acept,but… Read more »
Rocketboy1313
Guest
Much like C’Thulhu the Dragon god is in a sort of “Dead but Dreaming” state. It is to be awakened thru a spell/destiny combination and banished likewise. Also, they could show the heroes impotently stabbing at the indestructible eye of a dragon monster, but that would just be a waste time. It is a Godzilla type threat. I am a person who plays DnD and this movie is just fine. I will say that it is better than the first movie (not saying much) and takes the material seriously enough and moves at a good enough pace that people who… Read more »
KiraNis
Guest

Because stabbing it in the eye will only annoy it. as with all dragons.

Three Degrees of Bacon
Guest
Three Degrees of Bacon

Most of the confusion is because the movie builds off of D&D lore that it doesn’t explain. Basically, you should have done this as a crossover with someone who lives and breathes D&D to explain it to you.

EvilMoose
Guest
Whether or not the filmmakers actually bothered to ever research the game or have ever played a session in their lives is rather dubious. I haven’t seen either film for myself and I’m rather new to table-top RPGs in general, but from what I’ve heard, the first film had very little to do with the actual game, and one might assume the same of this sequel. It might have familiar names here and there (the term Colossal Black Dragon, for example), but the references appear to be in name only. If I recall, Black Dragons can spray acid, not breathe… Read more »
Tensen01
Guest
Having seen all three of the movies I can tell you that this movie(and the third) were made by people who had either played D&D or researched it. There’s no way they’d have a Lurker in this movie if they didn’t know about D&D. This is also not a sequel. Other than having the Bruce Payne character in common there is absolutely no other connection. Also, while this is, in no way a good movie, it’s bad in the exact same way old 1st and 2nd edition D&D adventures are bad. Not terribly well-written, not the best plot, but fun… Read more »
Jeff Jacobson
Guest

It’s the job of the film makers to do the explaining within the movie.

Tensen01
Guest

Not necessarily. This movie was clearly made for people who had played D&D before.

Mara Jack
Guest
As far as I’m concerned, that’s not a good way of thinking about making a movie. Sure, an adaptation will be aimed in priority to the source material’s fanbase, but in order for your movie to work, it has to be understandable by the general public as a whole. Not only is it necessary in terms of making entries at the theater, but it can make for more understandable writing, too. Besides, being a D&D player doesn’t necessarily rid the film of all its obscurities, either; because D&D is made of numerous editions, campaigns, and extensions referencing an oft-intricate lore… Read more »
Shinigami
Guest

Still lot better than first one althought that does not say much.

lobsterzoidberg
Guest

All I can remember is how disappointing the Dungeons and Dragons movie was.

As for the sequel? There WAS one???

Pille22
Guest

Yeah, saw them on TV.
The first was the best one…. but still not …. good.
The second…. I always forget there is a number 2 and 3 of those……

Can’t even remember part 3. Weird.

Pille22
Guest

Kill the dragon? NO.
It’s a creature of magic. You just don’t kill a dragon.

I thought so too. Don’t listen to that woman. She messed up nearly everything she touches.

I guess the resolution is in part 3? No, I don’t think so. ^^

P.S. : In the end it’s just : MAGIC!

Amesang
Guest
I’ll agree that the graphics (especially the dragons and the magmin [?]) are pretty bad (also, why is the black dragon breathing fire instead of acid?), but as a long time fan of 3rd Edition Dungeons & Dragons I actually found the film to be fairly enjoyable overall… and Bruce Payne is always a treat. That’s the problem, though, isn’t it? If you’re not familiar with D&D then I can see how much of the name dropping and odd events would confuse the average movie goer. Heh, reminds me of Noah Antwiler’s review of “Tekken: Blood Vengeance.” Regardless, I’d definitely… Read more »
tyrong kojy
Guest

Hey, better than the first.

Saryon
Guest

This movie looks like ass. I felt like I needed toilet paper for my eyes when I watched it. That said, I felt that they did a better job with the overarching storyline than the first one, although the poor acting really pulls it down.

Also, had you actually been paying attention(probably too much to ask), you’d realize that for 90% of the times you asked “What’s going on?” the movie actually does explain itself well enough. All that’s required is a modicum of logic(again, clearly too much to ask).

L_Wolf
Guest

I had no idea they made a second one… I could lived with that ignorance. >.<

EA Solinas
Guest

The sad thing is, this movie is actually pretty decent compared to the first. Sure, it’s clunky and confusing, but it actually shows respect to the source material and tries hard to actually produce a high fantasy story without gimmicks or comic relief. So it gets my goodwill for its good intentions and effort.

The third is just ass, though.

TragicGuineaPig
Guest

Dear Hollywood:

The next time you get the urge to base a movie on the game Dungeons & Dragons, why don’t you try this: look at some of the more popular Forgotten Realms or Dragonlance novels and try to base the script on stories that people might actually enjoy. Just a thought.

Rocketboy1313
Guest

I disagree. If this movie had a problem with too much confusing lore then those things are dump trucks full of the stuff.

Fran Ohmsford
Guest
To answer your question of why this film {and the 3rd} got made: 1) Because Dungeons & Dragons has a massive world wide fan base that actually desperately want movies based on it! 2) Because these actually aren’t sequels! – All 3 are completely seperate stories with no links whatsoever {No Bruce Payne doesn’t count because his character in this movie may have the same name as in the first but otherwise is completely different!}. The problem is that D&D has scores of novels by now, many of which could be adapted IF Hollywood would actually give Fantasy a chance.… Read more »
Rezro
Guest

I can agree with you. Instead try appeal to game fans, they should make adaptation of some novel. It would make better movie in end instead pretentious nerd-flick.

KiraNis
Guest

Someones a fan of the shanara novels (maybe)

The second is a Sequel it’s the whole reason why Damodar wants the orb because assaht from the first movie never removed the creature Damodar did everything to prolong his life because he fears death and the orb is the final step essentially his times run out so he might as well destroy Ishmer the land he hates.

Fran Ohmsford
Guest

The second is set over a hundred years after the first and Damodar is literally the ONLY Link between the two movies!
The Kingdom isn’t even the same {It seems to at the very least have been completely reorganised during that period of time!}.

It’s a sequel in name only!

And yes…Being a Shannara fan I realise that it is possible to have a sequel or indeed series spanning generations BUT there has to be more than the most tenuous of links between them!

JamiSings
Guest

I haven’t seen the D&D movies but I’ve played D&D and this movie look like it was based on a D&D session.

Rocketboy1313
Guest

I own the DVD and the special features emphatically state that was the feel they were going for and they would have put in more stuff of that type but the budget was a shoe string.

The director seems like the sort of mad genius that can take any insane premise seriously and works hard to present it as best they can.

JamiSings
Guest

Well, maybe it’s a movie meant just for D&D players to enjoy then and not people who’ve never played.

Rocketboy1313
Guest

It is a pretty niche audience. I like’n it to “Krull” or “Flash Gordon” in that it is very cheezy and aimed at the sort of audience who has already bought into the, “There is too much lore to cover narratively, but it makes sense for us to use lots of proper nouns.”

Fran Ohmsford
Guest
Yes…Because in D&D Clerics always try to Turn Dragons don’t they? Even if that was an Undead Dragon or Dracolich any Cleric worth his salt {which the one in the Movie is patently stated to be!} would know that it was unturnable! Also – In D&D you don’t just LEARN Divine Magic! It has to be given to you by the Gods in response to belief and WORSHIP! It truly astonishes me how Hollywood loathes Religion enough to remove it from D&D Movies! {P.S. The 3rd Movie makes an even bigger mistake here!}. Clash {the remake} and Wrath of the… Read more »
Tensen01
Guest

Oh just shut up.

JamiSings
Guest

Dude, calm down, I was just saying with the lack of explanation and the fact the wife keeps messing up it’s just like some D&D sessions I’ve played.

In fact, I used to play a mage who’s power was chaos. I created her with the intent of her being comic relief – she tries to throw magic darts and instead throws ice cream or popcorn balls. Somehow the DM decided this meant she was The Most Powerful Character Ever and the avatar of a Chaos Goddess.

Fran Ohmsford
Guest
Dungeons & Dragons is also a vast setting with myriad possible stories to be told – A D&D movie doesn’t have to be High Fantasy. It can be Mythological, Renaissance, Dark ages, Horror, Drama or even Romance! Take Ravenloft for instance – Many of Ravenloft’s Big bads are heavily influenced by Gothic Horror: Strahd Von Zarovich is a Vampire in the Dracula mould but different enough to be worth adapting I Strahd as a Movie. Victor Mordenheim is basically Frankenstein and Adam is the Monster – Neither can ever die, They just keep being returned to life to fight each… Read more »
leviadragon99
Guest

Depending on how big a dragon is, a fullsize claymore into the eye is only going to result in a very angry, immediately awake and half-blind dragon, not an improvement to your situation…

happymel
Guest

Yay! Another overacting villain! 😀 So I’m hoping that next week will be the third movie, correct?

FilmBrainsGoldfish
Guest

This is like some marketing person asked some D&D nerds about D&D, and they wrote down a bunch of bullet points, and just made a movie out of that.

DarkNacht
Guest

Actually if you watch it, its more like some D&D group wrote down one of their adventures and for some reason some one used it as a script.

Moviemantweeter1999
Guest

The real question is are you his real goldfish.

mbellardini
Guest

It seemed like a simple chase the macguffin type of plot, with a lot of confusing dialogue. They didn’t make good use of the first act to introduce the characters, and the world they inhabit, and this made the whole movie hard to follow.

WingedBeast
Guest

It may not be a great movie. But, it is, honestly, a more faithful recreation of the story crafted by a D&D session than the first one.

RJ Dalton
Guest

And that is why it fails. The structure of a D&D campaign is not something that will work for any other narrative format. D&D is basically improvisation with a framework. Film and books have structural demands that are comparatively rigid (especially film).

WingedBeast
Guest

True enough. I will say that the premise *can* be done with good writers/roleplayers.

Moviemantweeter1999
Guest

While the dragon did look like bad CGI you gotta admit that it did have a pretty cool looking design and I could also see another movie doing its design really well. Good review though. Doesn’t burett look like Jim carrey from the dumber and dumber movies or is that just me. Also that lava imp I’m now gonna call it the movies little kava baby.

slayride
Guest

This movie is a fairly accurate movie portrayal of your first ever DnD quest. Random encounters galore, plotholes, etc. All signs of bad GMing, too many random encounters tends to derail the plot. Still a better movie than the first one.

Fran Ohmsford
Guest

Not sure most people’s first ever DnD quest would be at the levels portrayed in this movie?

DarkNacht
Guest

They just cut most of the killing rats, kobolds, and goblins out of the beginning of the movie because, just like in the game, its boring.

panzi
Guest

I think the resolution of this movie is 640×480. 😛

the notorious white moth
Guest
the notorious white moth

…okay… whoever made this movie… YOUR DM SUCKS!

AlucardNoir
Guest

Heh… heh… two sequels? they made a third one? heh… heh, FUCK! IF this is a joke I’m … you know what, no, let’s be adults about this…. They made a third one? really? well, FUCK EM! A FUKING THIRD ONE? WASN’T THIS ONE BAD ENOUGH? DID THEY REALLY NEED A THIRD ONE? WTF UNIVERSE. WTF?

Rocketboy1313
Guest
They are not continuations of a story, each is self contained. So you could say they are just fantasy movies with the DnD header as a way of selling them more to the niche audience and to give the writers a body of lore to act as a starting point. The third one is actually pretty good. The trailer makes it look ultra cheezy (Seriously, look up the trailer “Book of Vile Darkness” it is hilariously bad) but them ovie actually moves at a good pace, has some cool characters (especially the Vermin Lord) and the main hero has a… Read more »
DarkNacht
Guest

The writer of the second and third movies is now working on another fantasy movie coming out in the next year or two so maybe there will be a 4th one.

ToonaFish
Guest

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for toning down “British accent is funny har har har” thing. I actually managed to SEE this review. It’s still there, but it’s just annoying, not unbearable. The stuff like sofa joke don’t work (no it’s not English humor, but “wrath of the dragon… GOD…” would actually BE funny if Rowan Atkinson performed it). Good job!

BB Shockwave
Guest

Weird you didn’t recognize scenery-chewing Damadar from the first movie, Mike. He’s the villain in this one – he was Jeremy Irons’ main thug in the first one.

Choronzon
Guest

“And yea! ‘Hearken thou!’ the gods sayeth unto us. ‘Do not let women folk speak lest there be fire and lightning following their doomed words.’ From thence, as the gods’ prophecies came true, we banished all women folk from the quest. Gary, just take off your wig and make-up and start a new character.”

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