Sibling Rivalry: Jurassic World

Which one liked it and which one didn’t?

About Doug Walker

Creator of 5 Second Movies, Nostalgia Critic, Bum Reviews and more.

88 comments

  1. Am I the only one to notice that they were, in fact, making fun of themselves in this movie : all this talk about “people always want better and bigger” and the criticism of marchandising, they clearly are indicating that they KNOW they are doing a fan service movie, and that it is ful of clichés and stupid situations (that Doug is angry about), but that they doing it because people are asking for it !!!

    Also the CGI quality is not excusable.

  2. Loved this movie and Even the crappiest JP cgi is better than the best non JP cgi dinosaurs

  3. Also anyone notice JP has a divorce or separation subplot in every movie revolving around the kid characters
    First movie Hammond’s daughter. Second movie Malcome’s wife abondond them. JP 3 Kirbies are separated and in this one kids parents are getting a divorce.

  4. The thing is that… this movie is awful… and I could write a book of what is wrong with this movie. The climax was cool and the intro was fine, but everything inbetween was just a mess.

  5. Indominus-rex is a she.

  6. I definitely agree with points made by both Doug and Rob, but overall I liked it enough to sit on Rob’s side of the fence, excellent sibling rivalry!
    I am disappointed by Doug’s calling the Indominus Rex a ‘he’. I’ve always loved how he refers to the T-rex as a “she”, so many people make the mistake of assuming the dinosaurs are male, even though it’s explicitly stated in the first and fourth film that they’re female. But I digress.
    Also, I totally thought the same thing as Doug, that the Dimorphodon was a genetic splice of pterodactyl and T-rex, but apparently they were a real kind of pterosaur! How the hell did that thing keep it’s head up???
    Anyways, I wasn’t automatically enraged by Doug’s first facebook status on JW, (the one with ‘the room’ reference), because I totally see what he means, and for the most part, agree, but like Rob, I left the theatre satisfied.

  7. Wow, I expected doug to pass out his face was getting so red and worked up on this one. Chill out man.

    I liked it and gotta disagree with doug. they did some good stuff with this one. And regarding the indomitous Rex (sigh, STOOOPID name) It wasn’t that obvious it was part raptor. It had ridges like an Anklyosaurus. a mouth like a T-rex. sure the body is similar to a raptor, as are the claws, but it wasn’t that obvious.

    I did think the divorce sub-plot was really freakin pointless. Well acted, but pointless. I also did like the return to the ruins of the original Jurassic park.

  8. You know, after Mad Max coming out mere weeks ago…
    I kind of can’t stand the VISUALS of this movie.

    It’s 2015 and it’s worse than the 1993 movie in the creature design / level of detail department.
    Why?

    We’ve had amazing giant robots in Pacific Rim and Transformers (and the Shredformer too) we’ve had amazing creatures of Pan’s Labyrinth and the Hobbit we’ve had the new Gojira and Mutos and now we get shitty dinosaurs.
    Why?

    Just weeks ago – literally WEEKS ago – we had an amazing movie that I dunno I might say surpassed the level of detail of any movie since 2010 (at LEAST) when it comes not only to visual detail but also visual creativity and now we should settle for shitty dinosaurs.
    WHY?????

    Yeah, that “I want to FUCK… I’m sure you can relate to at least SOME of that” joke wasn’t funny. Maybe the movie should’ve been rated “below 13 otherwise you’ll be annoyed by immature attempts of immature humor”

  9. achillesforever6

    Yes Doug this movie should have been Rated R because its not like the Jurassic Park franchise isn’t about introducing children to paleontology. No its should be gory and violent much like noted gore fest JP which only has one scene of gore really. Hell Jurassic World is the goriest of the series. That really rubbed me the wrong way.

  10. Avatar Fangirl16

    I’m on Rob’s side with this one. Yeah, the CGI is pretty crappy and the dinosaurs could’ve done more, but I had lots of fun watching it. It’s not as good as the original, but it’s a blast. And the ending ROCKED

  11. Robert Dennison

    What do you want Doug? What do you want?!

    CGI is bad in this movie mostly because we don’t have too many animatronics. The homages may have been too much for some people and the I.Rex is a little disappointing in design however this film is a wonderful ride.

    Go out and see this movie! It’s flawed but holy shit if you like Jurassic Park this is the better sequel.

  12. Robert Dennison

    Doug I must refer you to Acrocanthosaurus, Carcharodontosaurus and Majungasaurus which could be mistaken for the I.Rex.

  13. I’m with critic on this one.

    From a fangirl perspective, it was a lot of fun to watch. But from an even halfway critical perspective it was laughable. The acting was awful. Just awful. And yeah, if the scenes aren’t necessary, cut them out. “Well we don’t need to work hard on the romance cuz people aren’t gonna care” Then don’t put it there at all.

    While I love the idea of training raptors and how it turned out. they needed a better actor. I can’t stand characters that try to act all tough. If you have to constantly remind us you are an alpha, chances are you’re not badass at all. What I liked about the first is people trying to make it in a setting from long ago with the little knowledge they currently have of it. That’s what made Grant more of a badass then Pratt.

    Say what you will about the actors in the first, but they still felt more real to me. Here, it’s like Matthew Broderick. I’m constantly reminded someone is acting. It was far too predictable and some stuff like the “romance” does come out of nowhere. In the first, it’s barely hinted at and you only have their chemistry (yes I agree with Critic on that) to go off of. But because dinosaurs/action are more important, it only goes as deep as it needs to. And I liked how Grant didn’t just suddenly change his mind about kids. He probably still doesn’t want them. He just learned to cope with them. It’s a believable ending. In this, it felt like Disney, slapping the moral in your face right from the get-go. It’s kind of annoying. Also, the older brother needed more of a personality. He was just boring. The younger one I kind of liked though. And the divorce thing really is out of nowhere. In the first one, I never even thought of “he left us” meaning the divorce but rather the lawyer abandoning them so really, if you never read the books it doesn’t even matter.

    And yeah, when I heard the premise of this film, I was definitely expecting A Theme Park Gone Wrong and people dying. You can be creative and keep it PG13. That to me is a poor excuse for lack of creativity. Some of the most gruesome things appear off screen and in your imagination. How cool would it have been to see real chaos though.

    Overall, the movie was okay. I kinda wished for some animatronics to make it look good but whatever. Not as good as the first but it was worth my time just to see Blue shoot out of fucking nowhere and go crazy on that Hybrid.

  14. ZeppelinSkywalker

    Love the review! Love everything you do. DO SIBLING RIVALRY ON GAME OF THRONES!!! PLEASEEE!!! its long overdue guys!

  15. “I’m a Psychopathic Carniverous Dinosaur! I’m a Psychopathic Carniverous Dinosaur, Dinosaur” to the tune of I’m a Mother-Fucking T-Rex.

  16. One major question to all the Jurassic Park movies logic since Steven Spielberg made it in 1993, Why breed or clone particulary carniverous (meat-eating) dinosaurs? I mean fucking why? And remember in the original first Jurassic Park, the only reason why all the dinosaurs got out and were running wild and free ever since was because so-called underpaid unappreciated traitor employee fat computer junky hacker Dennis Nedry played by Newman from Seinfeld Wayne Knight turned off all the security alarm systems in order to steal unhatched dinosaur embryos for a rival company guy who gave him a Barbasol shaving cream canister and later when escaped on a jeep during the Isla Nublar hurricane, gets lost and crashes his jeep, loses his glasses, encounters a Dilophosaurus, mistaking it for acting like a dog because of his poor vision and eventually gets attacked and devoured for a late dinner by the Dilophosaurus, oh and Doug you can be really psychotic and mean-spirited, look I love you but shut the fuck up for once or tone down or calm the freak down in your critical reviewing rage at a movie’s especially a big-budget blockbuster movie unless it’s a really bad one like Jupiter Ascending. But seriously dude your blood pressure may rise to a 160 man with your indignant uncontrollable hysterical rage, Rob or Robert could you like tranquilze your brother sometimes please, I’m surprised he didn’t get a heart attack for real this time I mean just blow off some steam and just fucking relax, you’re a completely off your meds rocket to the moon Douglas.

  17. I haven’t seen this movie yet but I don’t think they could have gone too gory or else the movie wouldn’t be a PG-13 anymore. Mad Max is for a slightly different demographic, Doug. Also, I posted this on another video but I LOVE seeing Doug pissed off. I will see the Spoiler Corner once I’ve seen the movie. Although, you did kinda spoil the raptor thing.

  18. Hmm.

    Never occurred to me that tim and lex’s parents were getting divorced, even though it was mentioned at the beginning of the movie till i watched this.

    Actually, it never occurred to me that Hammonds daughter that was going through said divorce, was their mother.

    On that note, i think Doug and Rob wrong about the scene where Lex says “he left us.” I think Doug and Rob mentioned that it was in reference to the divorce, and in a subtle way it probably was, but I thought it was more direct to the fact that the “blood sucking lawyer” abandoned her and Tim to hide in the bathroom a few minutes earlier.

  19. I absolutely cannot agree with Rob here. It’s like not only he refuses to acknowledge Doug’s points, he actually tries to belittle him by pretending he’s just nitpicking about the CGI or has nostalgia goggles. No, Doug is rasing some very good points here, Rob just refuses to listen to them like a freaking child. And this is coming from someone who usually thinks Doug is a hell of a nitpicker. This movie is a cliche overload with cartoon villains, terrible subplots, stupid dialogue and yes, terrible CGI.

    If there’s one thing I don’t agree with Doug, though, is about the ending scene. I thought it was too over-the-top, to the point of stupidity. It demands an insane amount of suspension of disbelief, and it’s obvious that the scene was created in response to criticisms about Jurassic Park III (in fact, a particular criticism that Doug made in his review of that film), and they decided to throw away logic for fanservice.

    I mean, come on! I can accept dinosaurs being very intelligent, but I just can’t accept them behaving practically like humans.

  20. It’s funny how Doug is basically acting exactly how people were portrayed in the movie. He’s bitching that he wants things bigger and scarier and more violent, which the movie was pretty much satirizing the entire time.

  21. Couldnt disagree more with Doug this time, maybe the first time ever. He’s really off base imo. Honestly the things he seems to want in the film are the things he’d usually be ranting about. He is of course totally entitled to his opinion, but the reasons he gives for not liking it are insane. I-Rex wasnt over the top enough? Dont we have enough CGI fantasy dragon things these days? It wasnt corny enough? Seemed plenty corny imo, enough to be fun without getting too silly. An R rating? Really? These are really family films, and so they should be. Needed less characters and more action? Kind of seems like he wanted Michael Bay’s Jurassic Park.

    I really enjoyed the film. Surprised how much I did, I expected it to suck. I generally feel pretty negative towards current summer blockbusters, all CGI fests, superhero movies, “dark” Nolan type movies or teen movies trying to be the next Hunger Games. Its hard to have fun going to the movies the way it was growing up (Im in Doug’s age group, we got the golden age of summer movies). But I just had fun with this film from beginning to end. Really made me feel like a kid going to the movies again. Sure, its far from perfect, I could certainly come up with some complaints (D’Onofrio’s character and the stupid “weaponising dinosaurs” subplot, moments of bad CGI etc.) but I dont care, I just had a great time watching it. Something Ive not gotten from a movie in a long time.

  22. Ok am I the only person who wants to say fuck the kids? They have no reason to be in the movie! Just cut them out or minimize their role a lot, the first third of the movie doesn’t need to follow them. The movie should follow Owen and Claire and focus more on the Military plot because I feel like that’s where a sequel will go. I also feel like we should of followed more of the character of the Professor in charge of making the Dinosaurs because he does feel like a Dr. Frankenstein for Jurassic Park. I also agree with Doug that they should of had bigger scenes. I think they could of done the Raptor scene earlier in the movie and followed that up with them releasing other Raptors that were being trained or other hybrids that were in development.

  23. Man, I am truly in awe of Rob’s self-control here. I don’t know if I would have been able to keep from running screaming from the room during Doug’s rants in here. Hahahaha

    • Oh, and an amendment concerning one of the biggest complaints from here:
      I didn’t think the Indominus looked ANYTHING like a normal raptor aside from a few very minor characteristics. It looks a lot more like a spiny white T-Rex than anything.

  24. I enjoyed the film. It gave me exactly what I was looking for.

  25. Talk about a sequel to J. World already. I hope it turns out like this ‘http://www.cinemablend.com/images/news/42704/_1398266227.jpg’

  26. What’s the deal with Michael Crichton and his deadly amusement parks? As rob pointed out this movie, Jurassic Park, and Westworld seem to follow the same pattern. In Jurassic Park/World you get dinosaurs that start going after the guests instead of robots. and Yul Brynner is replaced by a T-Rex.

    It’s strange that the movie I saw before going to see Jurassic World happened to be Westworld. It’s just a coincidence, just picked a random DVD to watch.

  27. I like it. Seems the visuals are a big thing for Doug. In regards to the intensity, I don’t know if you can have a violent movie with as big of scope as this type of movie. With the amount of costs to make something big, you’ll likely have to focus on a big demographic.

    I was watching Dredd (casually I’m not that into movies anymore), and that one is mainly condensed in a single, closed location, like the old scifi action movies that were made on closed sets, and were at night for the most part.

    I suppose, I like most people give it a slack since it has dinosaurs. I mean, I think the dumb plot is up there with Pacific Rim and I didn’t get why people like that movie. [Can’t get much into the action if I don’t care about who is fighting who].

  28. Zartan The Destroyer

    This movie was re-hashed crap with some pandering moments.

    /opinion

  29. Zartan The Destroyer

    Oh and those kids dying would have made it a classic. Millennial children are awful.

  30. I actually saw this in theaters and I left it wishing that this was what we should have gotten instead of Lost World and JP3. I enjoyed the scene with Chris Pratt’s character doing clicker training with the raptors mostly because I have a friend who teaches dog training classes as a hobby. But there are three things which destroyed the movie for me.

    1) Following what happened, you would think that they designed the park with like bunker areas which fully locks from the inside and has enough supplies to take care of people for a week. Somewhere to keep people from becoming prey because it would be a given that breakouts will happen.

    2) The level of stupidity that had to happen to cause the entire plot to happen. There are so many points where someone with two brain cells to rub together would prevent the plot. An example is that people would know that the “Shit-your-pants-o-saurus” should have been socialized from the beginning. Furthermore, the park runner wanting a scarier dinosaur could just be a well trained, very human friendly dinosaur trained to act the opposite of what it really is. Like training a very friendly dog to bark and growl on command.

    3) The romantic subplot is completely forced and annoying and doesn’t really feel like it fit the movie.

    My roommates at the time hated the whole “kids are bored of dinosaurs” plot and actually could rant for hours about how they feel that it’s bs. But in all, it’s been the best Jurassic Park sequel ever.

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