Stuff You Like Vlog: Don’t Speak Now

A message for People Who Think Objecting At Weddings Is Hilarious. Newsflash: best case scenario you get fined. Worst case you get sued AND you go to jail.

About Sursum Ursa

Ursa presents Stuff You Like, where fangirls + analysis + awesome examples of media = good times for all.


  1. We have a similar thing in the U.S.: you can also go to jail for stopping a wedding based on stupid reasons. Just ask Kim Davis, that county clerk in Kentucky.

    • That’s someone who makes me embarrassed to live in the U.S.

    • Technically Kim Davis was objecting to do her job based on the notion that officiating same sex marriage licenses went against her religious beliefs (ie just trying to justify being a bigot). Apparently she, and every other idiot that thinks like her, has forgotten the whole ‘separation of Church and State’ thing that is still a law here in America. That’s one of the reasons why anyone, not just same sex couples, can get married at the local courthouse. Because you no longer need a priest or other clergyman to decide whether or not your marriage is legal. It’s been like that for sometime now. It’s people like Kim Davis that make me, and half the country, ashamed to live in the U.S.

      Barring that, I believe Ursa (Jill) was referring to people that object, for funsies, during the actual service. Not at the signing of marriage license part of it. I don’t think asking, “Is there any reason why these two should not be married? Speak now, or forever hold your peace” has completely disappeared from wedding ceremonies. I believe it still happens at ceremonies for people of certain faiths (I think Catholics, Traditional/Orthodox Jews, and a handful of other Christian branches still implement it); but I’m unsure of the ramifications involved with objecting as a joke. I think at the most, the person might be kicked out of the venue, but I’ve never heard of anyone being sued or jailed because of it.

      Although it still stands, you shouldn’t do it. Especially if it’s a joke. If you feel that you need to say something to the bride or groom (bride or bride/groom or groom what have you), and you’re a close confidant or family member, then you should bring it to their attention, in private and a decent amount of time prior to the wedding, like a few months or more beforehand, and not say, a day or half hour before when everyone is getting ready to walk down the aisle.

      • MidnightScreeningsman2014

        I’m just curious where in the bible does it say that god bands gay marriage(where!!). Cause Kim Davis is an idiot if she thinks god doesn’t want her to hand out marriage licenses.

        • Thing is, there is mention of homosexuality being against God’s will, but here’s the thing, that whole passage is about when the Hebrew’s were facing really tough times and needed rules from god and how to survive and live their lives, including no non-procreation sex, no shellfish and not shaving your beard. But those laws applied for really only those circumstances, see what happens when bible verses are taken out of context?

          • MidnightScreeningsman2014

            Oh now I understand. Guess Kim Davis took it to far but that was in the old days so why follow that rule now!!!

          • Wait a second? This is Old Testament, right? I thought that all the rules of The Old Testament were replaced by the ones in The New Testament?
            Which is kind of the whole deal of Christianity.

      • GenrlContctUnit Arbitrary

        “just trying to justify being a bigot”

        why is everybody dead set against the idea she might be sincere in this? people can believe bad things sincerely

      • Separation of church and state isn’t a law in the USA. It’s not even in the Constitution. It’s a concept written about in a letter by Thomas Jefferson stating that the government should never establish a national or state religion or show preferential treatment for a particular religion or sect. That’s all it means.

        • I beg to differ. While the phrase originated with Jefferson’s correspondence, numerous court cases have laid precedent for it being a canonical declaration on the scope and intent of the First Amendment to the the United States Constitution. See Reynolds v. United States (1878) and Everson v. Board of Education (1947).

          The wall of separation is a functioning legal concept under the US Constitution. There is no wiggle room on this.

          • MidnightScreeningsman2014

            The first amendment says actually that we as Americans dont need to respect a religion so that’s why people probably didn’t care in congress and they just sent kim davis to jail for that. Also it does say in the constitution that we have freedom of speech so clearly Kim Davis has right to talk about her religion but people don’t need to respect that and they didn’t respect it and they just thourgh her in jail for her own personal beliefs(beliefs that are ridiculous to me so there we go!!)

      • Indeed.
        If your religious beliefs prevent you from performing your job, you aren’t fit for that job.

  2. Sucks. I was going to comment on YouTube, but they have been disabled.

    I agree this isn’t a funny thing, but I would like to see this in a movie. Like that’s the plot of the movie.

    A Couple was about to get married and it was disbanded and it becomes a mystery on finding out who and why. It wouldn’t bee 100 percent realistic, but would be nice to see. Something like this was a second married and the ex-partner is bitter because they still want to save the married after the divorce or, a reverse version of something like Brother Bear 2 (I feel dirty. lol!) and there was an old promise and the other still took it serious.

    I vote Ursa should write the scipt! So also votes this, say I. lol!

    Or if the movie exists, what is it’s name?

  3. MidnightScreeningsman2014

    Now that I’ve learned about it I agree that objecting at weddings is really stupid and if someone does there dumb!!!

  4. If you’re going to object at a wedding you better have a good reason, like someone better be wanted for murder, rape, or some heinous thing, or already be currently married to someone else. It has to be something extreme and something that’s actually true.

  5. I didn’t know that you could go to jail for objecting to a wedding anywhere or anytime. O.O

  6. I see. This rule is a remnant of a long gone age, a relic noone truly NEEDS anymore. It’s just there to honor tradition. But so is marriage, so I guess everything’s fine.

  7. In the US, the whole objecting thing is just an old tradition with no real legal standing or requirements for inclusion. It was made dated by better record-keeping and the ability to got an annulment. In must cases, legal objections can found well before the wedding begins.

    Object for a lark is something that can vary form wedding to wedding, but its not something you’ll get set to prison for. On the other hand, if you object for something serious and not in a joking way, you damn well better have prof, as laying out false accusations is a serious offense (although, that could apply in any event).

  8. Number 1, I wonder what happens if someone has Tourette’s.
    Number 2, I wonder if this makes me an awful, awful person…

    • That’s literally not at all how tourettes works.

      • In many cases of TS, it does actually cause people to shout out whatever they’re hoping they don’t say.

        Not all TS is “pure T,” other disorders can influence it.

      • In a minority of cases, that is literally exactly how Tourette’s works. From a helpful handout from the Tourette Association of America:

        “Some vocal tics are more complicated and can include words or phrases. Often these words or phrases don’t sound like they are a part of a conversation – the words are barked or grunted and will often appear to be inappropriate. In a minority of cases the words are profane (ie., swear words, ethnic slurs and other socially unacceptable words or phrases). ”

        Awful though I occasionally may be, I like to be factually accurate while doing so.

        • Okay, I literally have Tourettes and that description you used doesn’t go with your precious comment.

          Tourettes works in a much more random way, yes someone with Tourettes very well may end up having a verbal tic after the question is ask but it’s pretty damn unlikely that they’re verbal tic just so happens to fit flawlessly into the current conversation.

          That’s not how it works.

  9. I gotta wonder, does this EVER really happen in real life, for the LOLs or not, or is it just something you’re maybe just a bit paranoid about? I know it probably happens on soap operas & things like that a lot, but in the real world? I really don’t think it’s a problem.

  10. Wait. The people who are intending to get married can no longer get married because of this… even if your drunk uncle openly admits it was just a gag? For how long? 24 hours? A fortnight? Where’s the magical cut-off point?

  11. Tangentially, can we stop having the scene in the film where someone uses this convention to declare their love to someone? It’s creepy and horrible, because unlike The Princess Bride, people aren’t typically forced into marriage against their will (in rom coms anyway) or so flighty and changeable that they leave their partner at the altar just because someone better comes along. At least, they’re not the sort of people I like to root for.

  12. This was a really interesting video Ursa, I like how you drew a line between how it is portrayed as last-minute tame drama in the romantic comedy movies and the reality of it happening in real life. I don’t think in the times I have ever attended a wedding it has ever happened, even though my friends and I have joked about it on occasion, we have never dared to to do it, mostly because no real reason to. But until now, I didn’t know it was a considered a fine or jail-time to do it depending on some circumstances and places.

    Keep up the good vids Sursum Ursa 🙂

  13. What if you don’t belong to a Parish. For example, I am an atheist of Jewish heritage. I have never belonged to any church, nor am I planning on belonging to one, but what if I meet a woman who is an Anglican, and while she is not very religious, she still wants to get married in a church (she enjoys the ceremony), what would they end up saying?

    • Thatpirate, if you’re in England, you still live in a parish (which is a geographical area), even if you never go to, or intend to go to, the church there. The ‘parish’ is just ‘where you live’. So they’d say ‘I publish the banns of marriage between thatpirate of St. Whereever’s parish Someplace, and thatpirate’s fiancee, of St. Somebody’s Someotherplace’.

      The rest of the world is a mystery to me, but that’s how the Church of England does it.

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